JustCretzu

It has been a while since I wrote here... What can I say...I have changed since my last writing...a lot... And it's good. I have a more calm and warm feeling. It appears I'm no longer in war with myself, nor with what I most despised in the world...I still despise it, just don't give a fuck anymore... Recent incidents have changed the way i see the world and have offered me a new perspective upon it. I no longer live in the past, I have forgiven myself for what I was not to blame, I have gain more confidence and trust in me, I might have lost a friend but have gain another... or who knows...lost?... I can't really say lost...just distant...

Lack of calmness, unnecessary reactions, hatred, revenge... More and more I find myself compelled to act on them... It's like I'm not in control of my actions anymore...like I have another personality that drives me to do things that I once ignored or simply didn't find the reason or purpose in doing... It's slowly changing the way I think, act, behave...it's killing me and replacing me.... Or is it evolving...is it turning me into something better? I have no remorse for my actions anymore, I feel no pity, no sadness, no nothing...not even love...do I need love?... I think not... What did love ever do for us besides bringing suffering in th